Snakes and Thangs

Whenever I enter a bathroom, I feel this overwhelming need to look inside the shower. There is a rational person inside me screaming, "YOU'RE CRAZY!! Don't Do It!" but I always ignore him. This isn't always a necessity but definitely something important if the shower has a curtain rather than a door. You can see through a door, not clearly sometimes, but enough to know if something or someone is inside. I suppose that is what I am looking for, a surprise guest hiding with the shampoo. I guess you could blame this on my childhood and adolescent obsession with horror movies. As a child, I was surrounded by movies, many of which were unsuitable for a child my age. At 8 years old, I was quoting Eddie Murphy movies (and this was well before he became less threatening by playing the donkey in Shrek.)
One of the movies I was fascinated by, and annoyingly haunted by as well, was Psycho. This movie ruined all horror films to come. Now I know this sounds weird, but ever since I saw the infamous shower scene I couldn't help but imagine other horrible things happening there. And I would steal or borrow these atrocities from other scary movies, mostly ones that had nothing to do with the shower. Take, for instance, Anaconda. The movie is about snakes indigenous to the Amazon who go on an eating spree when a wildlife tv crew shows up in "their" jungle. After watching this movie a good 6 or 7 times, I would imagine myself being attacked by one of those hungry snakes while showering, it's giant head shattering the glass and surveying my body before wrapping around me, crushing my bones. It was motivation enough to shower quickly for a good three or four months. Sometimes, when I'm in a hurry, I think back to Psycho and I take the fastest shower you've never seen, unless of course you're hiding with the shampoo.